It’s funny how certain events or conversations can conjure up all sorts of memories about people we care about who have passed away. It all started just before I went to Africa, when my mother gave me my Nan’s ring to wear, because she said my Nan would watch over me and keep me safe. My mum’s not at all a spiritual person in the religious sense, and if you asked her I don’t think she could explain to you what her true beliefs are, but one thing she is sure of is that people who have passed over to the other side become some one’s guardian, and watch over and protect the living as best they can. For her it’s my granddad who does this, and for me it’s my Nan. I too am sure of this, and even before I started wearing the ring, I have always felt my Nan’s presence close to me ever since she died.
My Nan was born in 1920 to a very poor family from the potteries, the place where me myself was born. She married my granddad fairly young, he was seven years older than she, and if my maths is correct she had her first of ten children when she was 26. I’m not sure what she did as a job if she ever worked at all, my graddad did something in the army, but unfortunately they both died when I was too young to take an interest in family history. My mum was the youngest of all her children, and I suspect her favourite in her own way. My Nan wasn’t a very affectionate person with words, she was one of those people who expected you to automatically know she cared about you without her saying so, but it showed in the things she did. Both she and my granddad doted on me as a child, and were very protective because I was blind. I used to go to their house all the time after school until my mum finished work, and my Nan would always have a packet of salt and vinegar crisps and some peanuts ready because she knew they were my favourite snacks to eat. She spoiled me rotten! I used to drive her mad I’m sure, I was a very noisy child, always bouncing around and singing and generally being very loud. I used to stand with her in the kitchen when she was preparing the dinner, and when she’d peeled the potatoes I used to role them noisily along the draining board by the sink because it sounded to me like trains on a track. I would also rifle through her jewellery box, ask her if I could call my friends on her phone, and pretend her walking stick was a broom stick and that I could fly on it. One thing I miss about my Nan was her cooking. She made the best chips in the world, and I haven’t tasted ones like it ever since, and doubt I ever will. She always had the kitchen door open, and when you walked up the street towards the house, you could catch the smell on the wind, and it used to make my mouth water. I think the reason I like chips so much as an adult is because they hold so much nostalgia for me more than anything else. My mum and I would walk in the house and my mum would always say, “don’t give her any chips, she hasn’t had her tea yet,” and then when she went through to say hello to granddad, my Nan would always whip some from the frying pan, wrap them in a piece of kitchen role and sprinkle them with salt and vinegar. My mum would always scold us both on her return, but it was always worth it.
I was also very close to my Nan, I told her everything that was going on at school, and in my home life which was often rocky as my mum and step dad faught a lot of the time. When I was ill it was always my Nan who would look after me if my mum had to work, and we used to walk to the local shop, me holding on to the side of her shopping trolley, and she would stop and talk to everyone, always telling them that I was her grand daughter and how wonderful I was. Towards the end of my granddad’s life he was very ill, and although she often complained about having to take care of him there was never a couple who loved each other more, and even when my mum had grown up she said she would go visit and walk in on them cuddling or catch him stroking her arse or something like that. My granddad spent a lot of time in hospital, and towards the very end was moved back home to die in peace. I was six at the time of his death, it was a Saturday night around Easter time, and we were just on the way out when we got a call from my Nan saying that she couldn’t get any response from my granddad. Both my mum and I went round there, to the consternation of my step dad who thought I shouldn’t go, but I was adamant that I wanted to be there. When we arrived, we found that he was dead in his bed in the living room, and the only thing I remember about the following few hours was my Nan hugging me while we both cried.
So my Nan spent the next three years living with the one son who hadn’t married or left home, and I spent a lot of time there, talking to her, playing games with her and just spending quality time. I guess at that age, even with the passing of my graddad, I thought she’d live forever. She actually deteriorated very quickly, which in one way was a blessing, but ironically it was me who noticed that something wasn’t right. I came home from school one day to find that she wasn’t walking very well, that she was slurring her words, and that she couldn’t really form a proper conversation. She also smelled like she hadn’t made it to the toilet in time, but being a nine year old, I didn’t really know what to do. She was a diabetic, and somehow, I can’t remember if she told me or if I guessed, but I knew that her sugar level was low and this was one of the reasons for her state. I made her a cup of tea with lots of sugar, and when she drank it she still wasn’t any better. Now my Nan was one of those people who would not go to the doctor for anything, and I knew that if I’d suggested phoning the doctor she would have been adamant that I shouldn’t. So I went in to the kitchen on the preteens of getting a drink, and called the doctors surgery. They were closed, and I was given another number which I then called, I was put through to a doctor who seemed amazed that he was speaking to a nine year old, and was asked to explain my Nan’s symptoms. I don’t really remember what I said to him, I just remember that my Nan kept calling to see where I was, and that I told the doctor she wouldn’t want me to call. Within the hour the doctor had arrived, and my Nan was furious that he had come. He examined her, and called the rest of the family woo all arrived, and insisted that she go in to hospital. I don’t remember what exactly was wrong with her, I just know that she went in and never came out.
That was a Friday night, and on the Sunday she had a heart attack which she survived. She was then moved to the cardiology department where her heart was monitored, and about a week and a half later she had a stroke, which she again survived. By then her speech was slurred, she was paralysed down one side, and she couldn’t swallow and so had to be fed intravenously. Death was all around me at that point in my life, I remember on one visit to the hospital the woman in the next bed passed away, and I sat and listened while the doctors tried to resuscitate her to no avail. Soon after that my Nan slipped in to a coma and remained like this for I think another week or so.
We spent all our free time at the hospital then, I remember talking to her, and when her fingers swelled the nurse’s took off her wedding ring and the ring I now wear. She must have been aware to some extent and there was evidently still some brain activity going on, because when they took off the rings she twisted her face and made a groaning noise, like she really didn’t want that to happen. The family was told to expect her death at literally any minute, and I believe they took turns staying with her through the night. To my best recollection it was a Sunday that she died. I was at the hospital, down the corridor with my mum and step dad getting a drink, and my uncle came running and said that she was going. We all ran back to her bedside, and we all lined up to kiss her goodbye as she died. After I’d kissed her, she made this rasping noise, which sounded a bit like she was choking, and then she was gone. I just remember sitting on a chair by her bed, and leant against her still body, buried my face in the cover and cried. Looking back I guess that I was so young to experience something like that, and I mourned her for a long time afterwards. That was also the time I knew I really didn’t believe in God, because I had made a bargain with him a few weeks before, that I would be good forever if he kept her alive, and I just remember being so angry with God and preying to him prayers of anger, saying how much I hated him and that I would never be his friend ever again for taking my Nan away.
Like I said before, ever since she died I have always felt her with me, watching over me, although I never even owned anything that belonged to her. All her things went to her children, my mum, aunts and uncles, and I clung desperately on to my memories of her. I often think about her, and try to tell my younger cousins what she was like, and I often wonder what she would have thought of me if she’d still been around. Would she be proud of what I’ve accomplished? How would she react to my lesbianism? Would she have liked my partner and my home? All these questions I know will never be answered, but now that I have it I often touch the ring and try to reach her in my mind. I know she’s there watching over me, I can truly feel it, and I feel such a strong love for her, and if there is such a thing as a place where we all meet after we’ve left this world I will run to her with open arms, a child once again.
I wanted to share these memories with you because she’s been on my mind lately, and I’ve even dreamed about her which I’ve not done in years.
I love you Nan!
Monday, August 28, 2006
Friday, August 25, 2006
Communication
Last weekend DL and I sat down and had a heart to heart, the reason for this being the lack of communication between us lately. That's not to say we don't talk to each other or anything, but we seem to be less open about our feelings these days. This all stems from my trip to Africa and the effect it had on each of us in turn, and on the relationship as a whole.
Back in January my dream of going to Africa was just that, a dream, and in my heart I never actually thought it would really happen. When my plans started to come together however, and I spoke about it with DL, she was mortified that I would be going away, but at the same time she knew how important it was to me and so wanted me to do it. We talked lots about it, and I came to the conclusion that I would rather go and have her mad at me, than not go and for that to breed resentment on my part. And so I booked the trip. To be perfectly honest i never told anyone just how upset DL was about the whole thing, because I didn't want people to think she wasn't supportive of the things I did, when in actual fact the majority of the time it's exactly the opposite. When I told her I'd booked to go, she cried off and on for the first few days, and then gradually became more and more angry towards me for going. I thought that the trip would actually do us both the world of good, I think that DL is sometimes too dependent on our relationship, and she needs to feel like there is life outside it in order for it to be healthy. But as the months drew on and I started preparing to go, booking flights, buying things to take, she started to withdraw more and more into herself, and refused to talk about it and how she was feeling.
I think we argued quite a lot about it all, we'd booked a holiday to Tunisia two weeks before I was due to leave for Africa, and she kept saying that it was pointless us going on holiday because she wouldn't have a good time as it would be so close to me leaving. She felt like everything up until that point was marred by the fact that I would be gone for a month, and that made me so upset and angry with her for feeling that way. Consequently, as she withdrew into herself, so did I. I pulled away from her because I didn't feel I could talk to her about the trip, share my worries, nervousness and excitement with her, and so I stopped talking to her about it altogether. I only spoke to friends and family about it when she wasn't there, and i started doing my shopping with other people so that she wouldn't have to be involved.
The week before I went was a bit of a nightmare to be truthful. One minute we were cuddling and she was crying, the next we were fighting and she was so angry. On the day I left she punched the door, I didn't realise at the time, and her wrist still hasn't heeled propperly. At the airport she couldn't stop crying, and it made her more upset at the fact that I wasn't crying when I left. I guess the experience held completely different feelings for both of us. I was excited about going, and I was sad to leave her, but knew that I would only be gone for a month and that she would hopefully still be there when I returned. In her eyes, I was leaving her for no good reason, she would be on her own in our house for a month, we may not be able to speak to each other everyday, and she was hurting.
While I was there things weren't too bad. We did manage to speak everyday, and I even came home early. Three weeks of being back however, have shown us both the effect it's all had on our relationship. On my return we still didn't open up to each other. DL was still mad, and refused to hear anything about my trip, or look at my photos, and got very jealous when I received emails from the people on the project, accusing me of having feelings for them, which is absolute bullshit. She refered to the people and the country in dirogatory terms, and said that everything I owned had come back dirty and that I smelled of Africa. This of course had an effect on the way I felt, and again I got so mad with her and upset that she was being this way. this reinforced even more my emotional distance from her, not only concerning the trip, but also the way I felt in general. In the time I've been back we've hardly talked about the way we feel, just got on with day to day life, DL pretending the month apart never happened.
Over the weekend however we somehow came to realise what was happening to us, and we sat down and talked in length about the way we felt about my trip, and about each other. I think we both feel hurt by the other in some ways, but we realise now that we need to work on opening up to each other again before it's too late. I feel relief more than anything that we've noticed what's happening, because I think six months down the line we'd have been worlds apart, and that would have been it. As thingsstand now we are still very much together, it's just that the lines of communication between us have become a little blocked.
This past week has been much better. We've talked a lot more, and done things just the two of us, like walking in the park, or having a drink together, that have given us some time away from the everydayness, where we can propperly talk. She's now seen all my photos, and has even bought me a beautiful brown suede album to put them in, and has paid for them all to be developed. That meant so much to me, and she even commented when flicking through them, "did you ever stop smiling while you were there?" and when I replied "no" she seemed happy about that. So hopefully we're now on the road to recovery, I love her so much and I'm willing to put my all in to this relationship, including a bit of work to make things perfect again.
Back in January my dream of going to Africa was just that, a dream, and in my heart I never actually thought it would really happen. When my plans started to come together however, and I spoke about it with DL, she was mortified that I would be going away, but at the same time she knew how important it was to me and so wanted me to do it. We talked lots about it, and I came to the conclusion that I would rather go and have her mad at me, than not go and for that to breed resentment on my part. And so I booked the trip. To be perfectly honest i never told anyone just how upset DL was about the whole thing, because I didn't want people to think she wasn't supportive of the things I did, when in actual fact the majority of the time it's exactly the opposite. When I told her I'd booked to go, she cried off and on for the first few days, and then gradually became more and more angry towards me for going. I thought that the trip would actually do us both the world of good, I think that DL is sometimes too dependent on our relationship, and she needs to feel like there is life outside it in order for it to be healthy. But as the months drew on and I started preparing to go, booking flights, buying things to take, she started to withdraw more and more into herself, and refused to talk about it and how she was feeling.
I think we argued quite a lot about it all, we'd booked a holiday to Tunisia two weeks before I was due to leave for Africa, and she kept saying that it was pointless us going on holiday because she wouldn't have a good time as it would be so close to me leaving. She felt like everything up until that point was marred by the fact that I would be gone for a month, and that made me so upset and angry with her for feeling that way. Consequently, as she withdrew into herself, so did I. I pulled away from her because I didn't feel I could talk to her about the trip, share my worries, nervousness and excitement with her, and so I stopped talking to her about it altogether. I only spoke to friends and family about it when she wasn't there, and i started doing my shopping with other people so that she wouldn't have to be involved.
The week before I went was a bit of a nightmare to be truthful. One minute we were cuddling and she was crying, the next we were fighting and she was so angry. On the day I left she punched the door, I didn't realise at the time, and her wrist still hasn't heeled propperly. At the airport she couldn't stop crying, and it made her more upset at the fact that I wasn't crying when I left. I guess the experience held completely different feelings for both of us. I was excited about going, and I was sad to leave her, but knew that I would only be gone for a month and that she would hopefully still be there when I returned. In her eyes, I was leaving her for no good reason, she would be on her own in our house for a month, we may not be able to speak to each other everyday, and she was hurting.
While I was there things weren't too bad. We did manage to speak everyday, and I even came home early. Three weeks of being back however, have shown us both the effect it's all had on our relationship. On my return we still didn't open up to each other. DL was still mad, and refused to hear anything about my trip, or look at my photos, and got very jealous when I received emails from the people on the project, accusing me of having feelings for them, which is absolute bullshit. She refered to the people and the country in dirogatory terms, and said that everything I owned had come back dirty and that I smelled of Africa. This of course had an effect on the way I felt, and again I got so mad with her and upset that she was being this way. this reinforced even more my emotional distance from her, not only concerning the trip, but also the way I felt in general. In the time I've been back we've hardly talked about the way we feel, just got on with day to day life, DL pretending the month apart never happened.
Over the weekend however we somehow came to realise what was happening to us, and we sat down and talked in length about the way we felt about my trip, and about each other. I think we both feel hurt by the other in some ways, but we realise now that we need to work on opening up to each other again before it's too late. I feel relief more than anything that we've noticed what's happening, because I think six months down the line we'd have been worlds apart, and that would have been it. As thingsstand now we are still very much together, it's just that the lines of communication between us have become a little blocked.
This past week has been much better. We've talked a lot more, and done things just the two of us, like walking in the park, or having a drink together, that have given us some time away from the everydayness, where we can propperly talk. She's now seen all my photos, and has even bought me a beautiful brown suede album to put them in, and has paid for them all to be developed. That meant so much to me, and she even commented when flicking through them, "did you ever stop smiling while you were there?" and when I replied "no" she seemed happy about that. So hopefully we're now on the road to recovery, I love her so much and I'm willing to put my all in to this relationship, including a bit of work to make things perfect again.
Friday, August 18, 2006
Shove a brush up my arse and I'll sweep the floor!
That’s totally how I feel at the moment. For the past week I’ve been up at 8 AM every morning, and for those of you who are thinking, “that’s nothing,” I really am not an early morning person. Consequently I am tired all of the damn time, and don’t wake up properly until around eleven, or after a decent cup of tea or three. I’ve also been out everyday with my lil pooch training, although last Thursday she was grounded by the trainer for not doing a poo in her pen like she should, and so we were confined to the house for a day. Other than that, and swiping a sandwich that I left on a plate on the table while going to answer the door, she’s been a little angel. I really can’t imagine life without her now, can’t believe she’s only been here for two weeks!
Other than being busy with the dog, we’ve had lots of visitors. Last weekend DL’s mum, cousin and grandma came to stay, which was lovely. We went out for lots of meals, did plenty of shopping, and ate far too much of DL’s home made chocolate cake, which by the way, is the momma of all chocolate cakes! DL’s grandma, being 86 and somewhat set in her ways, doesn’t know that we’re together, and so consequently we were just friends, and I was sleeping in DL’s room, apparently giving mine (the spare room), up for the family to sleep in. I’m kind of used to it now though to be honest, and I think it bothers DL more than it does me. The family is going to have to know soon however, as as far as I’m aware we’re spending xmas at DL’s parents’ house, and the rest of the family might think that a little odd if they don’t know we’re together, and especially if I’m wearing a ring on my left hand by then!
The only negative aspect of the weekend was that DL’s cousin antagonised the dog, and yes, she growled once again. Chesney though, being the shit that he is, wouldn’t go and sit down after she growled, and so she started barking at him. I was pisssed off that he wouldn’t do as he was told, and mad at her for growling, and the end result was that they both got a telling off, Una from me, and Chesney from DL’s mum, for messing with the dog in the first place. I can’t say I blame the dog to be honest, I’d growl at Chesney if I was a dog, in fact, I’d probably bight his leg! On Tuesday I had coffee with Sean over which we caught up on everything and put the world to rights, and then on Wednesday my mum came for the day. She’s fallen in love with the dog and wants to take her home, and was thrilled to watch us work together during training. Thursday saw the arrival of my dad, he actually made it here before midday which was something to note down, and Una was fine with him this time, so hopefully it was just a one off. On Thursday night DL and I went to the pub up the road, leaving the dog at home, and despite my new shoes absolutely killing my feet, we had a fantastic night, and it was lovely to just spend some quality time together. We both agree that we get caught up in the day to day, and don’t allow enough quality time for just us, to actually sit and talk and laugh the way we used to do. We’re either doing other stuff, on the computer, watching the L-word or generally too tired, and so we need to change that I think. It certainly rekindled some of the old spark for me on Thursday night, (not that it’s died or anything), and I was in fits of laughter for most of the night. We then came back and had incredible sex, something we’ve been doing a lot of lately! I did make sure the dog was occupied with a chew the whole time, she’s ever so slightly protective of me and I’m kinda scared she’ll think DL is hurting me or something as I’m quite vocal during sex, and start growling at her or something.
Today the dog has had her first free run, which means we can take her to the park now and let her off the lead, and the trainer seems to think I’ll be qualified by the end of next week to do my home routes, which is good. Tomorrow I’m meeting up with Kim for lunch and to go shopping, and I fully intend to have a lie in over the weekend and get some sleep. The bad thing is that the dog always seems to need a wee at about 8 in the morning, and prances around until I get up to take her. Maybe I’ll persuade DL to do that.
Sorry these entries are mainly about the dog, I’m not doing much else other than train with her at the moment, so there’s not a lot else to report. Life is good though, if ever so slightly hectic.
Other than being busy with the dog, we’ve had lots of visitors. Last weekend DL’s mum, cousin and grandma came to stay, which was lovely. We went out for lots of meals, did plenty of shopping, and ate far too much of DL’s home made chocolate cake, which by the way, is the momma of all chocolate cakes! DL’s grandma, being 86 and somewhat set in her ways, doesn’t know that we’re together, and so consequently we were just friends, and I was sleeping in DL’s room, apparently giving mine (the spare room), up for the family to sleep in. I’m kind of used to it now though to be honest, and I think it bothers DL more than it does me. The family is going to have to know soon however, as as far as I’m aware we’re spending xmas at DL’s parents’ house, and the rest of the family might think that a little odd if they don’t know we’re together, and especially if I’m wearing a ring on my left hand by then!
The only negative aspect of the weekend was that DL’s cousin antagonised the dog, and yes, she growled once again. Chesney though, being the shit that he is, wouldn’t go and sit down after she growled, and so she started barking at him. I was pisssed off that he wouldn’t do as he was told, and mad at her for growling, and the end result was that they both got a telling off, Una from me, and Chesney from DL’s mum, for messing with the dog in the first place. I can’t say I blame the dog to be honest, I’d growl at Chesney if I was a dog, in fact, I’d probably bight his leg! On Tuesday I had coffee with Sean over which we caught up on everything and put the world to rights, and then on Wednesday my mum came for the day. She’s fallen in love with the dog and wants to take her home, and was thrilled to watch us work together during training. Thursday saw the arrival of my dad, he actually made it here before midday which was something to note down, and Una was fine with him this time, so hopefully it was just a one off. On Thursday night DL and I went to the pub up the road, leaving the dog at home, and despite my new shoes absolutely killing my feet, we had a fantastic night, and it was lovely to just spend some quality time together. We both agree that we get caught up in the day to day, and don’t allow enough quality time for just us, to actually sit and talk and laugh the way we used to do. We’re either doing other stuff, on the computer, watching the L-word or generally too tired, and so we need to change that I think. It certainly rekindled some of the old spark for me on Thursday night, (not that it’s died or anything), and I was in fits of laughter for most of the night. We then came back and had incredible sex, something we’ve been doing a lot of lately! I did make sure the dog was occupied with a chew the whole time, she’s ever so slightly protective of me and I’m kinda scared she’ll think DL is hurting me or something as I’m quite vocal during sex, and start growling at her or something.
Today the dog has had her first free run, which means we can take her to the park now and let her off the lead, and the trainer seems to think I’ll be qualified by the end of next week to do my home routes, which is good. Tomorrow I’m meeting up with Kim for lunch and to go shopping, and I fully intend to have a lie in over the weekend and get some sleep. The bad thing is that the dog always seems to need a wee at about 8 in the morning, and prances around until I get up to take her. Maybe I’ll persuade DL to do that.
Sorry these entries are mainly about the dog, I’m not doing much else other than train with her at the moment, so there’s not a lot else to report. Life is good though, if ever so slightly hectic.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
a dog is a woman's best friend
Well, my little girl is settling in nicely, and she grows more accustomed to her new surroundings and owner with every passing day. I have to say I'm totally besotted with her, she is a joy to have around and lovely to cuddle. Just now she tried to get on the sofa while DL is hoovering, but I did have to draw the line at that I'm afraid.
The training is going really well. The first day felt really awkward for me, and it's quite something to have to put your trust in an animal. Ok correction to earlier statement, the dog is now on the sofa, and I haven't made her get down because she's scared of the hoover. Anyway, back to the training. It took me a while to get used to the dogs movements, because every time she turns left or right to avoid obstacles I have to move with her, and that's not as easy as it sounds as she tends to walk very fast. Once you get used to it though it really is liberating, and as time goes on I notice that she's testing my boundaries while we're walking, and also doing her best to ensure my safety. She's a little gem! We also took her to a restaurant and cinema the other night, and she was perfectly behaved. I feel like a proud parent.
So that aspect of my life is going great, which is more than can be said for DL and I at the moment. Not that we're bad or anything, but she seems to be quite jealous of the attention I'm giving to the dog and is feeling hard done by, which to be honest is beginning to wear thin with me. We're arguing quite a bit because she always seems to be in a foul mood over something, and I just feel like she never looks at the positives in anything. Today is an off day as we've just had yet another disagreement and she's in a strop yet again. Hopefully it's just a passing phase, i just hope it passes quickly because I'm becoming more and more intolerent to her somewhat stroppy teenager attitude.
I'm going to finish here, as the dog trainer will be here any minute and it'll be time to go for another walk. Woohoo! This weekend DL's mum, cousin and grandma are coming to stay.
The training is going really well. The first day felt really awkward for me, and it's quite something to have to put your trust in an animal. Ok correction to earlier statement, the dog is now on the sofa, and I haven't made her get down because she's scared of the hoover. Anyway, back to the training. It took me a while to get used to the dogs movements, because every time she turns left or right to avoid obstacles I have to move with her, and that's not as easy as it sounds as she tends to walk very fast. Once you get used to it though it really is liberating, and as time goes on I notice that she's testing my boundaries while we're walking, and also doing her best to ensure my safety. She's a little gem! We also took her to a restaurant and cinema the other night, and she was perfectly behaved. I feel like a proud parent.
So that aspect of my life is going great, which is more than can be said for DL and I at the moment. Not that we're bad or anything, but she seems to be quite jealous of the attention I'm giving to the dog and is feeling hard done by, which to be honest is beginning to wear thin with me. We're arguing quite a bit because she always seems to be in a foul mood over something, and I just feel like she never looks at the positives in anything. Today is an off day as we've just had yet another disagreement and she's in a strop yet again. Hopefully it's just a passing phase, i just hope it passes quickly because I'm becoming more and more intolerent to her somewhat stroppy teenager attitude.
I'm going to finish here, as the dog trainer will be here any minute and it'll be time to go for another walk. Woohoo! This weekend DL's mum, cousin and grandma are coming to stay.
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Home sweet home!
So I'm finally updating after six days of being back in the Uk.
The flight home was perfect. I was given a seat in the first class lounge at Joberg, where I had a six hour wait, so that wasn't bad at all, and I passed the time by reading and listening to my good old Ipod. I got a window seat on the flight to Frankfurt, which meant that I could sleep relatively comfortably with my head against the window. I sat next to a lovely Italian guy, who was great conversation and who had me in fits of laughter for the time i was awake, it's always good to have some one like that on a long flight. He was also very helpful in terms of calling the air hostesses if I needed anything, and he gave me his email address before we landed, and said that if DL and I are ever in Venis, to give him a call which was very nice. I took a sleeping pill and so managed to get a few hours, missing breakfast completely, and then when we arrived in Frankfurt I slept there as well until the next flight. On the flight to Manchester I was sat next to a little boy who was the cutest ever, and was talking to him and his mum for most of the way home. At one point we went through some heavy turbulance, an he said, "I'm scared," and when I said, also a bit scared myself, "Don't worry, it's just a bit windy that's all," it seemed to appease him which was nice.
I was greeted at the airport by my extatic parents, who didn't let me out of a hug for about five minutes solid. They loved my hair and said how well I looked after traveling for so long. My dad took photos lol. They drove me to my mum's house and we had breakfast and I made a huge fuss of Albert. I then showed them the photos I have on my lap top, and my dad went in to town to get another film I had developed. I managed to see most of the family over that weekend, my uncle Keith popped round, my step sister Alex, my aunty Pauline with Laura and baby Calum, who is one soon, and I went to see Ian Bev and the girls for a while. I was asleep by nine thirty on the Saturday night, and on the Sunday we arrived back in Sheffield at around six.
It was soooooooo good to see DL again after so long, and at first it felt a bit strange. When mum and her friend/part time lover had departed, DL showed me the rearranging of the spare room/study she'd been doing, and yes, we ended up on the bed, and didn't move for some time. It was absolutely fantastic, it was like making love for the first time all over again. At first we were both aching so much it was urgent and passionate, but then after that it became slow and sensual, and we've been more than making up for lost time over the past week.
To be honest the first couple of days at home felt a bit weird, and I didn't really know what to do with myself. I guess it's something to do with adjusting to the culture and way of life again, but it didn't stop me reveling in being in my lovely home with my amazing woman in my arms again. Monday was a busy day all in all. In the morning I had a call from guide dogs, who wanted to bring Una round for a visit, so we more than happily said yes of course, and they stayed for about half an hour while we sorted out when she would be coming and when the pen would be fitted. She seemed to like the flat, having a good old sniff around, a drink of water, and then sprawling out on our rug, bless her. I didn't want them to take her away again, but when they left we excitedly went off to Pets At Home to buy her some toys. After that we did the food shopping, and then went to PC world. I'd decided while I was away that I would buy a new lap top, as mine is past it's best, and my mum is keen to buy it from me anyway. After lots of time spent browsing I finally decided on one I liked. It's a Tosheba, it's very light, with a few hours battery life, 60 GB hard drive and 1 GB ram, and I love it. I've more or less transfurred all my files over to the new one now, and it's so much faster than the old one it's untrue. So my mum's geting mine in a few weeks, and she insists she'll come on line more, yeah right, that'll be the day! I also had a delivery of flowers arrive on the Monday from my darling DL, with a welcome home card, which was very romantic and lovely.
Tuesdays morning was spent undoing my brades, as my head had started to itch, and it seriously took over four hours to do. My hair was disgusting when it was all out, and it was a joy to wash it clean in our gorgeous shower! In the afternoon we went out to a local calvery for lunch and ate far too much, then went to change travellers cheques and for a walk in the park until it started raining. I spent the rest of the day faffing around on my new toy, and DL made a delicious chocolate cake.
Wednesday we were domestic goddesses in the morning, and then in the afternoon went to Sarah and Mat's house to have coffee with Sarah. While we were there I went exploring, accompanied by Quanda the dog, and promptly fell in love with the attic bedroom. I have quite a thing for attic rooms, I love when you can hear the rain on the roof, and that you're so high up, it feels like you're almost on top of the world looking down over the city, or wherever you happen to be living. So our house, when we buy one, must have an attic that can be converted in to a master bedroom for DL and I. We spent a few hours with Sarah, and she gave me lots of advice about how Una might be when she first arrived, and said if I needed anything jus to ring her which was lovely. In the evening we went to Casanova for a meal which was fantastic, and then we went to the local pub for a drink. That was followed by a very kinky love making session, which involved hand cuffs, a blind fold, a gag and a whip, do I need to say anymore? On Thursday I went to have my hair cut and we both had our eyebrows waxed, and then returned home so that the guy could fit the dog pen out back. He came back yesterday morning to finish it off, and the rest of the day was spent in utter anticipation until Una arrived at about four thirty.
While the trainer was here he showed me the correct way to feed her, and how to take her out to spend. You're probably thinking, how hard can it be feeding a dog etc, and although I've had dogs before, with guide dogs there are special ways of doing things so that everything is about disciplin and obedience, even though the dog may not realise it, because if the dog stops listening to you, it poses dangers when you're working it on the streets. For example, when she is fed, she has to sit, I put the bowl of food down on the floor, and she can't eat until I give three short blasts on a whistle. I never make her wait more than a few seconds, but those seconds let her know that I'm the boss basically. She is as good as gold though bless her, and does as she's told the majority of the time. When the trainer left she didn't even bat an eyelid, and we played with her for ages after that. So far she's managed to destroy three different toys by wripping them up, so DL is going to go out today and buy some hopefully less destructable ones. While we watched Crash on DVD, she settled down with a chew which kept her busy for ages, and after that we went to bed.
We decided that we didn't really want her to sleep in our room, but that it would be unfair to put her in another separate room, in case she became ill or distressed in the night. So we put her bed in the hallway outside our door, and left our door open. Well she was up and down most of the night, in and out of our room and then back to her bed, which is perfectly understandable for her first night somewhere new, but it meant that we didn't get a lot of good sleep. DL is still in bed now, and Una is sprawled out on the rug in front of me, which she seems to like more than her own bed, bless her. This weekend we have to stay home with her, to get her used to us and her new environment, and then training starts on Monday. I'll keep you up to date though, but at the moment I'm not totally sure what to expect either. I just hope she takes well to working with me and we don't have any major problems. She's so cute though, her coat is glossey and smooth and she has the softest ears in the world, and she's so gentle and affectionate. I'm so pleased she's here, I've been waiting for two years for this to happen, and I keep having to check she's really here. I'll try and post a picture of her here for you to see. Life couldn't be better right now!
The flight home was perfect. I was given a seat in the first class lounge at Joberg, where I had a six hour wait, so that wasn't bad at all, and I passed the time by reading and listening to my good old Ipod. I got a window seat on the flight to Frankfurt, which meant that I could sleep relatively comfortably with my head against the window. I sat next to a lovely Italian guy, who was great conversation and who had me in fits of laughter for the time i was awake, it's always good to have some one like that on a long flight. He was also very helpful in terms of calling the air hostesses if I needed anything, and he gave me his email address before we landed, and said that if DL and I are ever in Venis, to give him a call which was very nice. I took a sleeping pill and so managed to get a few hours, missing breakfast completely, and then when we arrived in Frankfurt I slept there as well until the next flight. On the flight to Manchester I was sat next to a little boy who was the cutest ever, and was talking to him and his mum for most of the way home. At one point we went through some heavy turbulance, an he said, "I'm scared," and when I said, also a bit scared myself, "Don't worry, it's just a bit windy that's all," it seemed to appease him which was nice.
I was greeted at the airport by my extatic parents, who didn't let me out of a hug for about five minutes solid. They loved my hair and said how well I looked after traveling for so long. My dad took photos lol. They drove me to my mum's house and we had breakfast and I made a huge fuss of Albert. I then showed them the photos I have on my lap top, and my dad went in to town to get another film I had developed. I managed to see most of the family over that weekend, my uncle Keith popped round, my step sister Alex, my aunty Pauline with Laura and baby Calum, who is one soon, and I went to see Ian Bev and the girls for a while. I was asleep by nine thirty on the Saturday night, and on the Sunday we arrived back in Sheffield at around six.
It was soooooooo good to see DL again after so long, and at first it felt a bit strange. When mum and her friend/part time lover had departed, DL showed me the rearranging of the spare room/study she'd been doing, and yes, we ended up on the bed, and didn't move for some time. It was absolutely fantastic, it was like making love for the first time all over again. At first we were both aching so much it was urgent and passionate, but then after that it became slow and sensual, and we've been more than making up for lost time over the past week.
To be honest the first couple of days at home felt a bit weird, and I didn't really know what to do with myself. I guess it's something to do with adjusting to the culture and way of life again, but it didn't stop me reveling in being in my lovely home with my amazing woman in my arms again. Monday was a busy day all in all. In the morning I had a call from guide dogs, who wanted to bring Una round for a visit, so we more than happily said yes of course, and they stayed for about half an hour while we sorted out when she would be coming and when the pen would be fitted. She seemed to like the flat, having a good old sniff around, a drink of water, and then sprawling out on our rug, bless her. I didn't want them to take her away again, but when they left we excitedly went off to Pets At Home to buy her some toys. After that we did the food shopping, and then went to PC world. I'd decided while I was away that I would buy a new lap top, as mine is past it's best, and my mum is keen to buy it from me anyway. After lots of time spent browsing I finally decided on one I liked. It's a Tosheba, it's very light, with a few hours battery life, 60 GB hard drive and 1 GB ram, and I love it. I've more or less transfurred all my files over to the new one now, and it's so much faster than the old one it's untrue. So my mum's geting mine in a few weeks, and she insists she'll come on line more, yeah right, that'll be the day! I also had a delivery of flowers arrive on the Monday from my darling DL, with a welcome home card, which was very romantic and lovely.
Tuesdays morning was spent undoing my brades, as my head had started to itch, and it seriously took over four hours to do. My hair was disgusting when it was all out, and it was a joy to wash it clean in our gorgeous shower! In the afternoon we went out to a local calvery for lunch and ate far too much, then went to change travellers cheques and for a walk in the park until it started raining. I spent the rest of the day faffing around on my new toy, and DL made a delicious chocolate cake.
Wednesday we were domestic goddesses in the morning, and then in the afternoon went to Sarah and Mat's house to have coffee with Sarah. While we were there I went exploring, accompanied by Quanda the dog, and promptly fell in love with the attic bedroom. I have quite a thing for attic rooms, I love when you can hear the rain on the roof, and that you're so high up, it feels like you're almost on top of the world looking down over the city, or wherever you happen to be living. So our house, when we buy one, must have an attic that can be converted in to a master bedroom for DL and I. We spent a few hours with Sarah, and she gave me lots of advice about how Una might be when she first arrived, and said if I needed anything jus to ring her which was lovely. In the evening we went to Casanova for a meal which was fantastic, and then we went to the local pub for a drink. That was followed by a very kinky love making session, which involved hand cuffs, a blind fold, a gag and a whip, do I need to say anymore? On Thursday I went to have my hair cut and we both had our eyebrows waxed, and then returned home so that the guy could fit the dog pen out back. He came back yesterday morning to finish it off, and the rest of the day was spent in utter anticipation until Una arrived at about four thirty.
While the trainer was here he showed me the correct way to feed her, and how to take her out to spend. You're probably thinking, how hard can it be feeding a dog etc, and although I've had dogs before, with guide dogs there are special ways of doing things so that everything is about disciplin and obedience, even though the dog may not realise it, because if the dog stops listening to you, it poses dangers when you're working it on the streets. For example, when she is fed, she has to sit, I put the bowl of food down on the floor, and she can't eat until I give three short blasts on a whistle. I never make her wait more than a few seconds, but those seconds let her know that I'm the boss basically. She is as good as gold though bless her, and does as she's told the majority of the time. When the trainer left she didn't even bat an eyelid, and we played with her for ages after that. So far she's managed to destroy three different toys by wripping them up, so DL is going to go out today and buy some hopefully less destructable ones. While we watched Crash on DVD, she settled down with a chew which kept her busy for ages, and after that we went to bed.
We decided that we didn't really want her to sleep in our room, but that it would be unfair to put her in another separate room, in case she became ill or distressed in the night. So we put her bed in the hallway outside our door, and left our door open. Well she was up and down most of the night, in and out of our room and then back to her bed, which is perfectly understandable for her first night somewhere new, but it meant that we didn't get a lot of good sleep. DL is still in bed now, and Una is sprawled out on the rug in front of me, which she seems to like more than her own bed, bless her. This weekend we have to stay home with her, to get her used to us and her new environment, and then training starts on Monday. I'll keep you up to date though, but at the moment I'm not totally sure what to expect either. I just hope she takes well to working with me and we don't have any major problems. She's so cute though, her coat is glossey and smooth and she has the softest ears in the world, and she's so gentle and affectionate. I'm so pleased she's here, I've been waiting for two years for this to happen, and I keep having to check she's really here. I'll try and post a picture of her here for you to see. Life couldn't be better right now!
Friday, July 28, 2006
Going, Going, Gone!
It took three hours to get my hair done on Wednesday night, but I really love it and everyone seems to like it, especially the Africans. It only cost the equivalent of ten pounds anyway, and it would have cost a fortune in England, so even if it doesn’t last long it’s worth it. When I got home I called DL, and managed to shed some light on why she was so upset about not meeting me at the airport. Jokingly earlier in the evening one of the girls said, ‘maybe she was planning to propose at the airport’, and not really thinking it myself I told DL, more out of amusement than anything. Anyway, it turns out that the girl hit the nail on the head, and although DL wouldn’t admit to it directly, just refused to comment, I’m now sure that’s what she was planning. I can’t believe it, she’d mentioned before that she’d seen the perfect engagement ring, but said that she couldn’t’ afford to buy it yet. So I’m very shocked, and can’t believe I’ve screwed up her plans. Now I know why she was so gutted that I changed the flight. To be honest I think if she’d have proposed at the airport I would have passed out, this month has been emotional enough, and I need to recharge my batteries. She won’t do it now for ages I know, because I’m expecting it and she wants to surprise me, so I might be waiting a while yet.
Yesterday I took the morning off to pack all my things, and then went to the orphanage in the afternoon for the last time. I didn’t cry when I said goodbye, my emotions are completely screwed at the moment, as when we were in the car going to the other house for a wine and chese night, I again had to choke back tears for no particular reason. Very strange. I did cry this morning though when I said goodbye to everyone from my house as they left for work and do feel better for it. So now everything is packed, and I’m writing this while waiting to go to the airport. I just hope everything goes smoothly as I’ve changed my schedule. The plan is that I arrive at 8:45 tomorrow morning in Manchester, and mum will meet me there. I’ll go and stay at her house for one night and see all the family, and then drive back up to Sheffield on Sunday in conjunction with DL’s drive up from London, and meet her there. Then we have a full week to spend together until baby Una arrives. Sounds good to me, and although I’ve loved my time here, there’s no place like home.
Yesterday I took the morning off to pack all my things, and then went to the orphanage in the afternoon for the last time. I didn’t cry when I said goodbye, my emotions are completely screwed at the moment, as when we were in the car going to the other house for a wine and chese night, I again had to choke back tears for no particular reason. Very strange. I did cry this morning though when I said goodbye to everyone from my house as they left for work and do feel better for it. So now everything is packed, and I’m writing this while waiting to go to the airport. I just hope everything goes smoothly as I’ve changed my schedule. The plan is that I arrive at 8:45 tomorrow morning in Manchester, and mum will meet me there. I’ll go and stay at her house for one night and see all the family, and then drive back up to Sheffield on Sunday in conjunction with DL’s drive up from London, and meet her there. Then we have a full week to spend together until baby Una arrives. Sounds good to me, and although I’ve loved my time here, there’s no place like home.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Home sick, home early
I knew this last week would be difficult, as we did all the activities we wanted to do in the past three weeks, so now we’re just working and don’t have anything much planned before we leave. I was already feeling pretty home sick, but the real problem started when the schools began end of term tests this week, which meant that we couldn’t teach and there wasn’t much for us to do in the mornings. This morning it all hit me in one go at the school, we were sitting on the steps trying to make a plan of what to do, and Sophia suggested we could do some colouring with the younger ones. That’s fine in itself, but I’d just got to the point where I felt like I wasn’t being proactive enough in the work we were doing because of the school situation, my resolve broke and to my utter embarrassment I became tearful and really had to fight the urge to sit and have a good old cry. I explained to Marleen how I was feeling, and that being away for so long was getting to me and she took me home, and I made the decision to call my mother, and have her change my flight to an earlier date. I know it sounds ridiculous, but most people are leaving on Saturday, and I would have a full weekend of having nothing to do, added to not having much to do at work, and I can’t stand waiting around to go home. So, between mum and myself we spent all day on the phone to different people, trying to get the flights changed, and I even went to the airport, although it was of little use as they couldn’t do anything from there. Anyway, it’s done now, and I’m leaving on Friday morning. The only thing is I told DL, and she was really annoyed that I’m coming home early, and I can’t understand why. She said that meeting me at the airport was a big thing for her, and if I land on Saturday she’ll still be in London and won’t be able to do that, but surely us being able to see each other three days earlier than planned is better. I don’t understand anyway, and being angry and upset, her not being pleased I’m coming home was the last thing I wanted to hear, so we had words and I ended the call. Sometimes I really don’t understand the way she thinks. So tonight I’m going to have my hair braded, which I’m really excited about, then I have one day left, woohoo! This means I’ll be busy right up until I go home, and won’t have time to sit and think.
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Drunken Elephants
Oh dear! On Thursday night we all went on a booze cruise, and yes, you can guess why I’m saying oh dear. We started drinking at 4 in the afternoon on the Zambezi River, and I was on vodka and coke. By the time we got off the boat at about 6:30 I was drunk. By the time we left Hippo’s at midnight, I was absolutely plastered. I haven’t been so drunk in a long time, apparently I was dancing and singing, I ordered food and then didn’t eat it, mixed strange concoctions of drinks together, kept saying I was going home and ordered taxis which I then didn’t want, and I was sick repeatedly in the loo and kept on drinking afterwards. Disgraceful! The only saving grace was that Kate was even more drunk than I was, and when we got back she stood on a chair to kill a bug and promptly fell off. I got in DL's bad books because I called her, and then proceeded to have conversations with everyone in the room as well as her, which pissed her off, and then I fell in to bed at around half past midnight. Woke up on Friday morning feeling like death, couldn’t keep away from the loo for more than five minutes and had to take the morning off work. That’ll do me for the next year, and as yet haven’t been able to bring myself to touch a drop even though we were out last night. On Saturday we worked in the morning and then in the afternoon went on an elephant backed safari, which was amazing. There were two of us on an elephant plus a guide, and the tallest one stood at over ten feet. We had to walk up steps on to a platform to get on to them, and at one point we waded through a stream by the river so that the elephant could have a drink. It was absolutely wonderful and hopefully I’ll have some great pics. In the evening we went out to a seafood restaurant, and I had deep fried calamari to start, followed by prawn curry, which was delicious. Today most people are out, either doing the elephant safari or the gorge swing, so I’m home reading, writing and relaxing, and being slightly bored. I don’t like having nothing to do, it makes me miss home, and although I love it here, I’ve already started to count the days until I go home.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Education! Education! Education!
This entry is mainly to comment on the education system of Zambia and how appalled I am that actually educating the kids seems to be last on everyone’s list. I’m outraged because, within half an hour of arriving at the school on Monday, we were informed by the headmaster that the minister of education for Zambia had called a meeting and that it would take all day, so all the children apart from grades 8 and 9 were being sent back home. So to me, this poses the question of what kind of minister is he to call a meeting within school hours, making the kids miss out on a full day of there education? It’s not just that, over the past two weeks I’ve observed that:
A: the school day is supposed to start at 7 A.M. Lessons don’t start until 7:45 at the earliest, and that’s if the teacher is enthusiastic.
B: There is no structure to the length of the lessons, no bells to signify the end of a particular one, so for example the kids could spend an hour and a half doing maths, and then fifteen minutes doing English or vice versa. It all depends upon when the teacher decides they have to start something else.
C: The kids are not at all motivated by their teachers, and the staff are quite happy to sit chatting while the kids take an hour to do a piece of work that should take twenty minutes with some prompting and help from the teachers.
D: The teachers tend to set the work on the board, and then disappear, sometimes for the entire morning. So, if a child has difficulty with the work, no help is given.
E: If a teacher is off sick, the class is just left to sit there. There are no supply teachers and the children sit and hope that some one will come along and teach them at some point. This past week I’ve had kids come and beg me to teach them something, they are so keen to learn.
F: some of the teachers even get the work they are setting wrong. Words are misspelled on the board, and maths sums are done incorrectly. Thus the kids get confused.
G: In terms of lack of materials, the classrooms are stone walls with no windows and sometimes no proper floors. The desks are mostly falling apart, and often there are up to 8 kids crammed together on a desk meant for four, making it very difficult for them to write comfortably. There is a great shortage of text books, exercise books, and writing materials.
Just some things I have noticed while being here. This week I’ve been actually teaching classes everyday, it really is a case of walk around the school and see which classes have no teachers, and you can guarantee you can find a class easily. The hard part for me is knowing what to teach them, because as the grading system is different it’s hard to know what level the kids are at. To be honest even those in the higher grades are learning basic subject matter, so it’s not difficult to set work once you find out what subject they’re supposed to be doing. All they ever seem to do in maths as well, is fractions. The kids can’t do their times tables, yet they are being taught fractions. Even the teachers have a chart with the times tables on, so I’ve been doing lots of practicing learning them off by heart with the kids. It’s just so different from western education, I don’t know how the country ever expects that the kids will go far with a system like this. The brighter ones, if motivated enough will hopefully get a decent start, the rest either drop out, fail, or get married when they hit their teens and so don’t complete their education. It is not compulsory for the kids to go to school here. It’s madness and the whole system needs reshaping, and that fucking minister wants firing!
A: the school day is supposed to start at 7 A.M. Lessons don’t start until 7:45 at the earliest, and that’s if the teacher is enthusiastic.
B: There is no structure to the length of the lessons, no bells to signify the end of a particular one, so for example the kids could spend an hour and a half doing maths, and then fifteen minutes doing English or vice versa. It all depends upon when the teacher decides they have to start something else.
C: The kids are not at all motivated by their teachers, and the staff are quite happy to sit chatting while the kids take an hour to do a piece of work that should take twenty minutes with some prompting and help from the teachers.
D: The teachers tend to set the work on the board, and then disappear, sometimes for the entire morning. So, if a child has difficulty with the work, no help is given.
E: If a teacher is off sick, the class is just left to sit there. There are no supply teachers and the children sit and hope that some one will come along and teach them at some point. This past week I’ve had kids come and beg me to teach them something, they are so keen to learn.
F: some of the teachers even get the work they are setting wrong. Words are misspelled on the board, and maths sums are done incorrectly. Thus the kids get confused.
G: In terms of lack of materials, the classrooms are stone walls with no windows and sometimes no proper floors. The desks are mostly falling apart, and often there are up to 8 kids crammed together on a desk meant for four, making it very difficult for them to write comfortably. There is a great shortage of text books, exercise books, and writing materials.
Just some things I have noticed while being here. This week I’ve been actually teaching classes everyday, it really is a case of walk around the school and see which classes have no teachers, and you can guarantee you can find a class easily. The hard part for me is knowing what to teach them, because as the grading system is different it’s hard to know what level the kids are at. To be honest even those in the higher grades are learning basic subject matter, so it’s not difficult to set work once you find out what subject they’re supposed to be doing. All they ever seem to do in maths as well, is fractions. The kids can’t do their times tables, yet they are being taught fractions. Even the teachers have a chart with the times tables on, so I’ve been doing lots of practicing learning them off by heart with the kids. It’s just so different from western education, I don’t know how the country ever expects that the kids will go far with a system like this. The brighter ones, if motivated enough will hopefully get a decent start, the rest either drop out, fail, or get married when they hit their teens and so don’t complete their education. It is not compulsory for the kids to go to school here. It’s madness and the whole system needs reshaping, and that fucking minister wants firing!
Saturday, July 15, 2006
Zim, Zam, Zoo
Feeling sorry for myself didn’t after all last that long, and on Thursday night we went back to Hippo’s, to prove a point to both ourselves, and anyone who might have wanted to scare us away. We had a brilliant night, and made sure we got a taxi from the door this time. On Friday we worked all day, and then had about half an hour to hurriedly prepare to go to Zimbabwe. I managed to squeeze everything in to my rucksack, and carried a sleeping bag separately, and along with Kate, felt quite unsettled about having to carry our passports and money around with us after what happened. Everything was fine though, we passed over the border with no problem, and then were taken to Villa Victoria where we were to stay. The place itself was by African standards lovely, and we arrived to find a BBQ waiting for us, which was wonderful. Before leaving Kate and I had discussed sharing a room, as I’ve said before that both Annette who I share with, and Lisa and Jenny who Kate shares with go to bed earlier than we do. Earlier on the Friday we were asked if we were ok staying with the people we were already sharing with, and immediately Annette said it was fine before I could object. So I went to have a word with Dave on the quiet, and explained that I didn’t want to share with her, and that Kate and I would like to share a room. So all was fine, and Kate and I were put in to a room of four with Kirsty and Meg, which turned out to be lovely, and Annette and most of the others stayed at another lodge. However, when we got back and I jokingly asked Annette if she’d missed me, she said that yes she was quite upset that we didn’t get to share, and that if I wanted to share with some one else it was ok, (sniff sniff, sounding offended). So now I feel awful, because somehow she must have found out that I’d asked to be put with some one else. Oops! Anyway, back to the trip.
On that first night in Zim we went out, intending to just stay for a couple, as the big night out was on the Saturday. Anyway, as you might have guessed we ended up getting hammered, and didn’t leave until around two. It was a fab night, and I don’t think I stopped laughing the entire time at one thing or another. So we finally crashed in to bed with four hours to get some sleep, having to be up for six to do the lion walk on the Saturday. When six o’clock came, I have to say I wished that they’d just forget about the lion walk so that we could stay in bed, but it turned out to be such an amazing experience. When we got there we were given a talk about the lion’s, and then were taken on the walk with them. They were from seven to eighteen months old, and ran in front, or walked alongside us as we made our way through their territory. It was quite scary, but awesome at the same time, and while they lay down we could go and sit next to them and stroke their backs, which was incredible. I should hopefully have some amazing photographs to show back home, and Kate bought a DVD which I’ll try and copy. After the lion walk we then headed to the Victoria Falls, and got drenched from the spray, again another amazing experience. The water is so powerful, that it really does sound like traffic rushing past, and it’s something else to stand and smell the spray, feel the mist on your skin, and listen to the roar of a million litres of water per second cascading in to the river below.
In the afternoon we went to the local market to do some shopping, and I ended up having to go back on Sunday morning as I didn’t take enough money out to spend. The money situation in Zim is crazy, it’s around 400000 Zim dollars to the American dollar, and around 1000000 Zim dollars to the pound, and it fluctuates drastically daily. The notes tend to come in small dinominations, and so if you go out with say around 40 notes, you may only have around two pounds, which was exactly the mistake I made at the market. Anyway after both trips I came away with a chess set carved in stone for my dad, two large stone ashtrays, one with a hippo and the other with an elephant calved in to them for mine and Lucy’s mum, a drum, a hippo made from reddy brown wood, a necklace and three stone statues, all for less than fifty pounds. I loved haggling with the traders, and when people saw how much I persuaded them to lower the prices, they were asking me to barter for them which was amusing. A taxi driver over there also commented that if I wasn’t going back to England he would have hired me as a negotiator, having knocked his price down from 2000000 dollars to just over 1000000 for a taxi ride.
On the Saturday evening we went to the Boma restaurant, where we paid 35 dollars for food and entertainment. It was such a good night, the food was delicious and the entertainment fabulous. I had roasted vegetables in a garlic sauce to start, and then for my main course I tried Ostrich kebab and Warthog in a sweet sauce, with potatoes and stir fried veg, which was surprisingly good and for which I was proud of myself for trying. You could also get a certificate for eating a caterpillar, but I wasn’t brave enough to go for that. While we were eating people came around beating drums, chanting and dancing, which was wonderful, then afterwards we were given a drumming lesson, which was very amusing. We also tried the Boma cocktail which was foul, had our faces painted with tribal designs, and for one dollar had our fortunes told. The guy said that I was with someone whom I loved deeply and thought of constantly, that I would have two boys and a girl and then seven grand children, that I would live a long and healthy life, and that I would come in to a lot of money in six years time. We will wait and see how accurate he was. After the restaurant we went back to the bar and had drinks, but the night before turned out to be better and everyone was home by around one.
The only bad point about the trip was that my phone battery died and my phone wouldn’t charge for some reason, so I couldn’t communicate with Lucy the whole time I was there. I knew she’d be worrying, which made me worry even more, and on Sunday morning I asked to use the phone of the villa, and managed to leave a message on her mobile. My phone is working now though, which is a relief, I really would go crazy if we couldn’t talk while I’m here. We arrived back in Zambia this afternoon to fine that the house has now become a zoo. Along with the goat and three cats, we now have a dog called Toby, who is adorable, but not exactly house trained as yet. It’s lovely having a dog around though, as I can’t stop thinking about what it’ll be like getting a guide dog when I get back. Well, that’s it for now, I’m now half way through my stay, and it feels as though I’ve been here forever in many ways.
On that first night in Zim we went out, intending to just stay for a couple, as the big night out was on the Saturday. Anyway, as you might have guessed we ended up getting hammered, and didn’t leave until around two. It was a fab night, and I don’t think I stopped laughing the entire time at one thing or another. So we finally crashed in to bed with four hours to get some sleep, having to be up for six to do the lion walk on the Saturday. When six o’clock came, I have to say I wished that they’d just forget about the lion walk so that we could stay in bed, but it turned out to be such an amazing experience. When we got there we were given a talk about the lion’s, and then were taken on the walk with them. They were from seven to eighteen months old, and ran in front, or walked alongside us as we made our way through their territory. It was quite scary, but awesome at the same time, and while they lay down we could go and sit next to them and stroke their backs, which was incredible. I should hopefully have some amazing photographs to show back home, and Kate bought a DVD which I’ll try and copy. After the lion walk we then headed to the Victoria Falls, and got drenched from the spray, again another amazing experience. The water is so powerful, that it really does sound like traffic rushing past, and it’s something else to stand and smell the spray, feel the mist on your skin, and listen to the roar of a million litres of water per second cascading in to the river below.
In the afternoon we went to the local market to do some shopping, and I ended up having to go back on Sunday morning as I didn’t take enough money out to spend. The money situation in Zim is crazy, it’s around 400000 Zim dollars to the American dollar, and around 1000000 Zim dollars to the pound, and it fluctuates drastically daily. The notes tend to come in small dinominations, and so if you go out with say around 40 notes, you may only have around two pounds, which was exactly the mistake I made at the market. Anyway after both trips I came away with a chess set carved in stone for my dad, two large stone ashtrays, one with a hippo and the other with an elephant calved in to them for mine and Lucy’s mum, a drum, a hippo made from reddy brown wood, a necklace and three stone statues, all for less than fifty pounds. I loved haggling with the traders, and when people saw how much I persuaded them to lower the prices, they were asking me to barter for them which was amusing. A taxi driver over there also commented that if I wasn’t going back to England he would have hired me as a negotiator, having knocked his price down from 2000000 dollars to just over 1000000 for a taxi ride.
On the Saturday evening we went to the Boma restaurant, where we paid 35 dollars for food and entertainment. It was such a good night, the food was delicious and the entertainment fabulous. I had roasted vegetables in a garlic sauce to start, and then for my main course I tried Ostrich kebab and Warthog in a sweet sauce, with potatoes and stir fried veg, which was surprisingly good and for which I was proud of myself for trying. You could also get a certificate for eating a caterpillar, but I wasn’t brave enough to go for that. While we were eating people came around beating drums, chanting and dancing, which was wonderful, then afterwards we were given a drumming lesson, which was very amusing. We also tried the Boma cocktail which was foul, had our faces painted with tribal designs, and for one dollar had our fortunes told. The guy said that I was with someone whom I loved deeply and thought of constantly, that I would have two boys and a girl and then seven grand children, that I would live a long and healthy life, and that I would come in to a lot of money in six years time. We will wait and see how accurate he was. After the restaurant we went back to the bar and had drinks, but the night before turned out to be better and everyone was home by around one.
The only bad point about the trip was that my phone battery died and my phone wouldn’t charge for some reason, so I couldn’t communicate with Lucy the whole time I was there. I knew she’d be worrying, which made me worry even more, and on Sunday morning I asked to use the phone of the villa, and managed to leave a message on her mobile. My phone is working now though, which is a relief, I really would go crazy if we couldn’t talk while I’m here. We arrived back in Zambia this afternoon to fine that the house has now become a zoo. Along with the goat and three cats, we now have a dog called Toby, who is adorable, but not exactly house trained as yet. It’s lovely having a dog around though, as I can’t stop thinking about what it’ll be like getting a guide dog when I get back. Well, that’s it for now, I’m now half way through my stay, and it feels as though I’ve been here forever in many ways.
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