Saturday, May 20, 2006

Tickets and amusement!
Oh yes, oh yes, my flight tickets for Africa arrived this morning. All six of them! Yes, I have to change planes lots. I can't quite believe it, I'd been
panicking because they hadn't yet arrived, and called the airline yesterday to check on their progress. The woman told me I should have them next week,
but they came today and surprised me. They're now tucked safely away, in my green folder, in case I forget where they are. I'm so nervous and excited,
it's actually happening. I also read through some stuff about the project yesterday, and I'll have to be up at six in the morning everyday, as school begins
at seven fifteen. How am I gonna manage that? Lol! Anyway, the school day ends at around three thirty, and then I think it's off to the orphanage for a
while, and then the evening is our own. Wow, I can't believe it!

I also have to update with a very amusing story that I forgot to add in my last post. It's probably one where you had to be there to find it funny, but
I'll write about it anyway. Last weekend, just as we were on the way to collect Baby G and Will from the station, DL took out the rubbish to the huge bins
outside, which seriously are about head hight for me, (I'm five feet one). Along with the rubbish, she also carried her car keys, and yes, you guessed
right, along with the bags she also dropped the keys in to the bin. Well, it had been empied a couple of days before, so they went all the way to the bottom,
and landed with a clang, and I had to go and hold up the huge lid, so that my gorgeous woman could jump up and actually climb in to the bin to retrieve
her keys. Honestly, I was in hysterics. She stood there, in the bin, only her head visible over the top, and I kept threatening to drop the lid on her
while she looked for her keys. It was the funniest thing ever. At first she was majorly pissed off, but as tears of laughter ran down my face she saw the
funny side and we were both in fits as we headed for the car.

Anyway, the rest of this week after my birthday has been pretty uneventful, as I've just been working. Last night we did go out though, to a club night
called Climax at the uni. It was really great, as it was just the two of us, so we got to smooch all night long on the dance floor, and it had been ages
since either of us had a good boogie. For some reason when we got home we were both wide awake, and so talked for ages about sex.

it was actually quite an intellectual conversation, and one which I'd like to raise here, about how we would handle things if our kids started having sexual
feelings quite early on. The conversation arose because in that respect we are very different. I started experimenting on myself and with a friend of mine
from a very young age, i'm talking like nine or ten, whereas I was DL's first sexual partner. When I was younger, my mother caught me on top of my friend,
we were fully clothed, but kissing and kind of dry humping I guess lol, but she completely flipped her lid, and told us if we ever did it again, she would
stop us seeing each other. We were just kids, and didn't realise what we were doing or how serious it was, and although her reaction shocked us, it didn't
stop us. From then on I was and still am very experimental with sex, and wanted to do it all and try it all, as soon as, and often way before I was supposed
too. DL and I both agreed that if we knew our kids were having sexual feelings, we would try to handle it differently, and be more open and truthful with
them about things. I know for me, the effect a telling off from my mother had on me, was to make me even more secretive, and it didn't stop my friend and
I experimenting, and eventually making love from an early age. I guess the main point of the conversation was that people react very differently when it
comes to children and sexuality. Don't get me wrong here, I'm not saying that everyone felt the way I did, I know it's not the case for most people, but
people seem to clam up when the issue of broaching the topic of sex with a child comes up. I just think that we as a society aren't open enough with our
children about issues surrounding sex. For many parents, it isn't raised until the child hits puberty, and until they're a lot older it isn't something
the kids should be thinking about, let alone acting upon. There does, however, have to be a reason as to why we have the highest teenage pregnancy rate
in Europe, and I do think it's because we simply aren't open enough. I don't have kids, and I'll probably feel differently when I do, but I do believe
I would rather know if my child was having sex, and instruct them on how to do it safely, than having them feel they couldn't talk to me about what they
were doing, do it wrong, and end up pregnant or getting hurt. I saw a programme on tv, a real life documentary a couple of weeks ago, about teens and sex.
There was this one parent, who was very close to her daughter, who was sixteen I think. Anyway, this girl had been seeing her boyfriend for over a year,
they were going to get engaged, and they wanted to have sex. And so, the mother said that it was fine for her daughter to lose her virginity with her boyfriend,
in her own bed, in her own house. She said that this way, she knew where her daughter was, that she was safe, and because she knew about it she could support
her daughter emotionally. Anyway, the presenter of the programme seemed really shocked by this, and this is where I think the problem lies. I mean, surely
it's better for a parent to know what's going on, than for that girl to have lost her virginity in a public toilet, in a car, or wherever else, if her
mum hadn't been so open to her boyfriend staying at the house. Speaking from personal experience, when I had propper girlfriends that my mother knew about,
which was from the age of about fifteen, I had to keep my bedroom door open, and she would come upstairs every now and then, probably to make sure we weren't
getting up to no good. And so, because I was sexually active, we would find other, sometimes unsuitable places to have sex. That's why I just don't see
the logic to it. It also adds an element of danger and excitement for the young people involved, if parents are strict about issues surrounding sex. I'm
sure if my mother had said, "sure, you can do it in the house," I probably wouldn't have been half as keen to break the rules and go for it. I'd like to
know what other people's views on the subject are, and if you're a parent, how open are you with your kids about sex?

Anyway, we didn't end up getting to sleep until well after two this morning talking about it. My dad came over today with my dog in toe, and we went out
for lunch which was lovely, and the rest of the time I've been essay writing. I'm off to get dinner now, as it's getting really late.


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